Jesus and Satan were having an ongoing argument about who was better
on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God was
tired of hearing all the bickering.
Finally fed up, God said, "THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going
to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I
will judge who does the better job."
So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.
They e-mailed with attachments.
They did spreadsheets!
They wrote reports.
They created labels and cards.
They created charts and graphs.
They did some genealogy reports
They did every job known to man.
Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell.
Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power went off.
Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld.
Jesus just sighed.
Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted
their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming:
"It's gone! It's all GONE! "I lost everything when the power went out!"
Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work.
Satan observed this and became irate. "Wait!" he screamed. "That's not
fair! He cheated! How come he has all his work and I don't have any?"
God just shrugged and said,
Booo! Hiissss! I want my money back. (Oh wait, that's right. I didn't pay anything. ... Never mind.)
Well actually it's because Jesus uses a Mac
Ha... another funny one. I knew that was going to be the punchline though, but I still liked it.
The Sunday school teacher of a church had reminded her little students, "What's next week's memory verse?"
John 3-16! The chorus of little girls and boys resounded as they milled around the doorway towards meeting their parents.
The next Sunday, just as all her children were seated, fidgeting or chattering - the teacher asked,
"Ben, do you remember what's this week's verse?"
"Yes, ma'am." he sounded assured.
"Can you tell us what it is?"
"John 3-16, ma'am."
"Could you please to say the whole verse to us?"
Ben waited a while looking at the front evading the eyes of the teacher.
"Go on, Ben."
"Yes, go on."
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