Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Recently Appearing on a Post Office Wall
Last seen: On CBS 48 Hours Mystery Christmas night 2007
Nicknames-- Gentle Ben aka. Gentile Ben
Known Associates: Those Wesleyan types-- also fond of Pentecostals, Mennonites, Amish, and other pacifistic sorts
Known to have Friendly Arguments with: Dispensationalists, Calvinists, Liberals, Agnostics, Atheists, and non-Evangelicals in General.
M.O.: Runs a large propaganda operation, claiming Jesus was born in Bethlehem and is actually the Son of God. Known to have animated discussions on blogs, in print, on TV, and does frequent teaching and preaching around the globe. Seems to be ubiquitous (whatever that means).
Reward: Paid in Biblical denarii. You've still got to render unto Caesar on April 15th however.
Domicile: Lives in Lexington Kentucky, but is often out of town.
Warning: If you apprehend this man he will not resist. This may surprise you, but he claims Biblical precedent. Something about 'what would Jesus do?' Be careful however, he is a runner. If interrogated he will persist in telling that Jesus story. Be prepared for a long harangue.
N.B. If you see this person lurking somewhere wish him happy birthday, as he has one on 12/30. If he responds positively, you'll know you have apprehended the suspect. He will have forgotten the advice of W.C. Fields about birthdays, to wit "be careful, too many of those things can kill you."